English Is A Crazy Language

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.

--> There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

--> English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France…

--> Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

--> We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

--> And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

--> If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese? One index, two indices?

--> Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

--> If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

--> Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

--> In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

--> How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

-->You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
--> English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

--> P.S. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"?


Juliana said…
Hi Jul, for me English is my third languages ^.^ Sometimes i got headache between Dutch and English words :D
J said…
oo nga, kaloka. tagged you pala sa lair. pls. check. ingat!
Nova said…
i have no idea... but english is just as funny as our language i guess...

but accept the fact since English is the world's language as they say.. tama ba? hehehehe...

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