Monday, February 9, 2009

Stimulus Payment Info....

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Sad, but true.


Stimulus Payment Info
"This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment.
This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China .
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India .
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico , Honduras , and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan .
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan .
If you pay your credit cards off, it will go to bank management bonuses and they will hide if offshore. Same with stock investment.

Instead, you can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spending it on prostitutes, beer and wine (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since those are the only American businesses still operating in the US.

6 comments:

BongFlo said...

hi J! thanks for the visit... something serious is up and i'll be taking time off for a while (from blogging). just dropped by here to thank you personally. hope to be back soon... ciao!

Jona said...

hahaha! OA naman :D thanks for making me laugh through this post.
hope you're havin a nice day :)

Umma said...

hahaha.. good entry Mommy J.. it makes me laugh hahaha..
pero some are totoo ha, especially the Walmart thing.. hahaha..

Noemi "Mica" Watson said...

This is true!

Cathy said...

Or buy my handmades, LOL! Just kidding.

Sad but true. We had that same discussion last night with Hubby after we watch the Presidential conference. Only China is getting richer. I'm telling you 90 percent of items in a household are made in China. Reminded of a Chinese friend of mine before telling me she can't send anything to her parents back home since everything she buys here are made in China. Makes no sense sending it back to her country, lol.

DebbieDana said...

This made me laugh! But I also agree with Cathy, most of the items I see in the stores are made in China, kahit mukhang galing sa Pinas eh, hehe!

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